About

Known for nada, Brando Conklin has spent the past five years desperately searching for a set of alchemical ingredients which he hopes, if found, might result in the deliverance of worthwhile words. Convinced that if only he could capture these secrets, then perhaps he would no longer have to glimpse the frightening unknown as seen through the void of a blank computer screen.

But with the cry of 'Eureka!' yet to be heard, the question must be begged: Why write at all? To be sure, the art has been mastered already - and by those far greater than he. Why not make a Tik Tok instead? Show some skin to a subscription based Only Fans account? I mean, seriously, can't this fella read the room?  

Alas, the prognosis may be dire: that Mr. Conklin simply belongs to the genus Asinus, otherwise known by classicists as The Fool.

In the world of screenplays, he has earned top 15% distinction in the Academy's Nicholl Fellowship - a distinction, mind you, which meant absolutely nothing to no one.

At the present, he is writing his first novel, to be completed by September of the year 2022.

He is the architect of this website and is, in fact, the curled-over creature attached to the dirty fingers that have been writing in third-person this entire time.

My friend, all I can say is that if you are still reading this, well, may God help us both...
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Brando Conklin © 2022